Equality in a New Decade

2010 has been a busy year for gay rights.  As the year comes to a close, repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell looks very likely, states like New York and Maryland are taking a serious look at joining 5 other states (MA, IA, CT, VT & NH) and D.C. in offering marriage equality to their LGBT citizens, and groups like the American Family Association are finally having to spend their time and energy as they should, attempting a PR battle against being classified as 'hate groups' by the Southern Poverty Law Center.

None of these events we're witnessing is minor in the grand scheme of the gay rights movement. The end of Don't Ask Don't Tell, as easily evidenced with a quick Google search, is quite the contentious topic at the moment, probably mostly on the floors of the US House and Senate. The repeal's weighty effect on our nation is further displayed in the fact that a questionnaire was distributed to all US Service members earlier this year to collect their opinion on the subject.  I suppose gay people should be flattered that the consequences of our presence demand such exploration and analysis.  Is our freedom as humans to speak openly about the truth of who we are really something that should be up to a vote?  Besides, would the same rules not apply to us?

Of course repeal will mean that LGBT service members discharged under the policy earlier will be able to return.  It will also mean that LGBT service members will now be able to speak openly about their lives, to tell their friends about their spouse, or their boyfriend or fiance; open to share stories and pictures from their real lives with their friends, and not fear being removed from their positions because of it.

And even more importantly, those service members have little brothers and sisters back home in elementary or high school, and those kids will now know that their gay older brother or sister is proudly fighting for their country, able to be open about who they love.

That's not a minor change, and we should be proud that our nation has come to a place where it recognizes the wisdom in being fair-minded about an individual citizen's sexuality.  This current movement that we're witnessing, right here in December 2010, as John McCain permanently etches himself on the list of our mortal enemies, as legions of LGBT Chicagoans drive hours through cornfields to reach our promised land of equality on the other side of a "Welcome to Iowa" sign, we are truly witnessing history.

The important part is always the little brother and sisters, truthfully.  Since 2004, kids in Massachusetts have watched their gay and lesbian older brothers and sisters, and parents, affirm their love and committed relationship under the law of the land, and that change has had no small effect.  When children see that their adult role models recognize and practice equality for sexual diversity, their development will begin with an acceptance for those and other differences, and the future of our rights as humans holds so much promise.

I enjoy Andrew Sullivan's blog, and one of my favorite quotes of his is about how gay people have been "forced through the millennia to forgo the one thing that makes life worth living for so many - the love of one person for another, sacramentalized through sex, celebrated through friendship, forged by something heterosexuals have long called 'home.'"

I believe that in all this, that is what we're fighting for: our right to home.  Our inability to procreate does not supercede our ability to create, nurture and maintain a home.  And the love at the heart of that home is no less true, no less passionate, and no less sacred and exceptional an experience in the realm of human existence.  Our opportunity for equality in this time and place is itself exceptional, and we have our allies in the sexual majority to thank for bringing our cause to justice.  But we must not let the growing ease of our push turn in to complacency.

We must continue to fight for the eyes and ears of the little brothers and sisters who will only know what we teach them, who still see a fractured map of their own Land of the Free regarding equality based on the difference of who we create a home with.  Who know that their gay or lesbian sibling, or parent, in a civil union must still check "Single" on their tax form.  Who still know that their gay or lesbian family member in the military has to be someone that they are not all day every day, or they are not welcome.  They are our future, and that is what they're learning.  We must fight for them.

Please feel free to comment.